January 13 & 14 kicked off “anxiety week” with #MindsetReset. This post is a little of this and a little of that related to my reflection on anxiety/worry triggers and truths.
It’s a process not an event.
Mel Robbins
My triggers generally fall into two categories: concern for the safety of someone I love or the fear of not measuring up. For example, I worry that someone will try to harm/take my daughters when we are in public (ok, even a little when we are home… yea, pretty much always.) I also worry about fatal car accidents – that’s often a quick extreme thought when my husband doesn’t come home when expected or I start driving on slippery roads. Not measuring up connects directly to my limiting belief that I will let someone down. I get very anxious about entering new places, situations, activities, etc. if I am not certain about the expected behavior/conversation. I fear I will look stupid and others will judge me. I’m even anxious about talking on the phone. The pizza place employee might be thinking that I’m the worst pizza order-er s/he has ever spoken to. Yea, that’s a real problem for me. I know. Wow. That one also gets intense regarding any conversation with my mom or grandmother where they will be “invited” to comment on whether or not they think I did the right thing. You can look back at my post on limiting beliefs for more details on that.
DEFINITION: Worrying about things that don’t serve you or that you can’t control will trigger a negative physical response in your body. That physical agitation is anxiety.
DISCOVERY: When I let my anxiety take over, I start to yell. When I yell, people listen to me and start to do what I order them to do in order to get me to stop yelling. When people do things “my way” I get the illusion that I am in control so I can ignore the thoughts in my head that I really need to change.
Worrying will not change this. All it will do is COST ME time and joy with the people I love.
Be DELIBERATE about what you allow yourself to think. Mel’s video on THINK THIS NOT THAT continues to be monumental for me. I posted about my TRUTH STATEMENTS, and I speak them to myself during my morning routine daily.
First thing in the morning, I have also been practicing the visualization of the day’s situations. I will visualize myself being *healthy, *successful, *at peace, *accepted, *enjoying life. When I think about some of the goals I have in the areas of health, finance, relationships etc., I visualize next week, next month, next year. Then, take the next action step to move closer. There is a difference between worrying about something (stirring anxiety about things you cannot control) and managing it (taking action about what you can control).
“If you were to stop worrying, and you were to start thinking positive in your ability to fix this, and if you were to lower that level of stress in your body… What would you be able to find the time to try?”
Mel Robbins
Finally, but MOST IMPORTANTLY… two verses I came upon during my reflections on these topics speak directly to my biggest triggers. I think I’ll add these to my Truth Statement sign in the bathroom:
{Proverbs 14:26 ESV} In the fear of the LORD one has strong confidence, and his children will have a refuge.
{Proverbs 1:33 ESV}
…whoever listens to [God] will dwell secure and will be at ease, without dread of disaster.